Deployment Day #72

Thank you so much for all your tips on how to get the earring back in her ear. Of course today, the other earring came out!

I feel like something must have been wrong with these earrings to come out so easily since it didn’t happen to my other girls, but who knows.

Unfortunately, she was so traumatized by the first incident she wouldn’t let me near her ear to even try to put it back in.

It really isn’t that big of a deal. But you know how it is when things that aren’t a big deal, are a big deal, because the big deals are too much of a big deal to think about.


We are studying birds in science. I’ve been trying to get pictures of the birds that come in our yard so we can identify them.


Not quite fast enough to catch this bird on camera.

I feel like this is a good representation of my week. I’m two steps behind everything and everyone. Not where I want to be right now.

I still haven’t opened my birthday gifts. They are sitting on a chair in my bedroom.

At this point I’m thinking I might wait until next year. It’s driving the Commander crazy that I haven’t opened them. I’m sure they are great gifts I’m just not in a gift opening mood lately.

My husband has been deployed to the Middle East for 274 days.  These are my real thoughts expressing my heart during his absence.  I appreciate your prayers and kind words as we cope, adapt, and carry on without him until August 2014.  To read from the beginning, click here.

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  1. Toni, this is the first time I’ve commented on this series. I want to let you know that I’ve been supporting you in prayer.
    I was moved to write because of your writing of the unopened birthday gifts. I encourage you to open them. They connect you to those who gave them to you. Right now you need those connections. Open them for the one(s) who gave them to you, (if) not for yourself.
    Another thing, I wanted to let you know that the flash of white of the bird’s wings as it’s flying away is a familiar one to me. That flash of white is how I would identify Northern mockingbirds when I lived in east Tennessee. It’s not visible except as they flutter away, and those bars of white make their flight pretty distinctive when otherwise their gray is fairly non-descript at rest. So, getting there “late” was right on time for the best identification.
    Sometimes when you feel out of sync, you just have to rest into it and realize that it’s all in perfect order. Don’t worry about where “everyone” thinks you’re supposed to be in time. Just be. Our time is not God’s time.

  2. ” It’s driving the Commander crazy that I haven’t opened them.”

    Might be time to think about why you haven’t then. Your husband managed to acknowledge an important event from halfway around the world in the middle of a war zone. Why are you denying him (and your kids and yourself) the enjoyment of seeing the gifts gratefully received?

    That’s not meant to be harsh. I’m sorry if it sounds that way. I just think it’s worth thinking about what’s underlying this particular action. It comes across as punitive. I think we’ve all done things like this at times without even realizing it.

    • Toni Anderson says:

      Doesn’t sound harsh at all. I appreciate the encouragement to open them. I think what’s holding me back is that I genuinely want to be excited about it, and right now that seems so difficult. I don’t do a good job of “faking it” around my kids and I want them to know I’m truly grateful for the gifts. I told the Commander I’d open them tonight.

      • I’m glad you’re opening them. We had a milestone birthday at our house this week, and there’s another one coming up next week. It’s super-hard to feel like celebrating when your family is split apart, I know.

        Suggestions on the birdwatching…video the birds rather than taking still shots, if possible (maybe use a phone?). Have each birdwatcher remember one feature (body color, head color, wing feathers, beak shape, number of toes) and then you can put all those clues together and identify the bird. Go to and print out coloring pages (as we did, back in wild, wonderful WV!) for those days when you can’t get a good look at the birds in your yard.

        No advice on the earrings – although I agree that they should not have come out so easily.

        Prayers forthcoming.

  3. Phew – glad I sent fruit! HA!!! Do the man a favor & open them up!!

  4. Commander? says:

    The name seems weird to me. Just so you know, she doesn’t call me that at home 🙂

    She opened my gifts.

    It was funny because my sister got her one of the books I sent her. We must think alike.

    Dineen, Wow! You awed me with that comment.

    JoDi, thanks for encouraging Toni. I am sure she was overwhelmed with all that is happening.

    Nancy, thanks for your help with bird watching. We have been causal bird watchers for a long time but there is so much more to learn.

    Thanks all for encouraging and praying for my family. You have blessed us greatly through the years. I am even more thankful for your support these days.

    • Toni used to call you the Sailor in the story of how she arrived at becoming The Happy Housewife; so you’ve been promoted. 😉 Though the Sailor does have a certain something for a young-love romance story…

      I am glad I could encourage.

  5. Happy Birthday, Toni! I think u should open your birthday gifts. Your commander of a husband chose gifts specifically for you and he wants you to enjoy them. I’m sure it’s hard not having him there with you. But enjoy your day and your gifts and eat some chocolate! Hugs and love to you! Prayers for all of you!

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