Deployment Day #52

We baked cookies today. Lots of them, in preparation for our annual cookie frosting party. Usually it is a really big deal, but this year I’m just happy to get cookies made.

I’m considering taking the kids out Christmas shopping. I haven’t actually been Christmas shopping  this year. I’ve done all my Christmas shopping online, except for the candy I bought at the grocery store this week.

I miss Christmas shopping which is kind of funny because usually my shopping goes like this.

Leave all the kids with dad and head to the stores. Wander the stores, overwhelmed by the endless choices, people, and lack of parking. Also, I’m usually freezing. Come home and order everything online.

This year we’ve given the UPS guy some great cardio has he walks up our driveway delivering gifts. My four year old calls him Santa.

But without actually attempting to go to the store it doesn’t seem quite right. I hate leaving the kids because I already have to leave them for necessities like medical appointments.

If there is one thing this deployment has taught me is to stop being so judgmental. I’ve never really thought of myself as that way until I was at the commissary last night.

When I parked my car there was a car parked in front of me and had something (or someone) bouncing around in the backseat. As I walked by the car I noticed a boy, about seven or eight sitting (bouncing) in the back seat and a sleeping toddler strapped into the carseat next to them.

My first thought was… OH MY WORD, THEY LEFT THEIR LITTLE KIDS IN THE CAR!!!!

But then I started thinking about it.

• Maybe they are just running in for diapers.
• Maybe they are out of milk.
• It isn’t very cold outside, actually it is quite nice and the kids are dressed appropriately for the weather.
• We are on base, it is pretty safe.
• Maybe they are a single parent.
• Maybe the kids are being picked up from day care after a long week and they didn’t want to wake up the sleeping toddler.

I’m not saying it is a good idea to leave your kids in the car (I don’t think it is), but I also realized how quick I was to make a judgement about the person who did it.

I don’t know their story, their situation. Rather than be judgmental I need to be more grace-filled, more compassionate.

We’ve all seen people make choices that are bad in public. But the reality is, we’ve all made bad choices. Whether these choices are fueled by circumstances or just plain and simple that guy’s a jerk we’ll never know.

But what I do know is that gone are the days that I think I’m somehow I’m a better parent than the person who did it. Because I’m not.

I’m learning a lot during this deployment….

My husband has been deployed to the Middle East for 274 days.  These are my real thoughts expressing my heart during his absence.  I appreciate your prayers and kind words as we cope, adapt, and carry on without him until August 2014.  To read from the beginning, click here.