To all my readers who would love to lead a more frugal lifestyle, but are facing opposition from their husbands, I sympathize. I have been there. For over 14 years I begged and pleaded with my husband to turn our finances around and my words fell on deaf ears. I have received emails over the past few months from wives would like their husbands to change in the area of finances and saving money.

I thought it might benefit you all to hear from my husband on this topic, so I have turned this post over to him.

Toni asked me to respond to your email because I’ve been there as the husband who doesn’t want to become frugal. I wanted my stuff and I wanted it right away. This is pretty standard for our society today - it’s just not biblical.

The bible, as presented to me by Howard Dayton and Dave Ramsey, showed me I needed to get out of debt and to serve Toni and my family with financial security.

Without getting too “sermony” let’s take a look at some scripture that jumped right out at me once Dave and Howard opened my eyes:

• Proverbs 22:7 – The rich rules over the poor and the borrower is slave to the lender.

• Hebrews 13:5 - Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.”

• Deuteronomy 28:12 - The LORD will open to you his good treasury, the heavens, to give the rain to your land in its season and to bless all the work of your hands. And you shall lend to many nations, but you shall not borrow.

• Deuteronomy 15:6 - For the LORD your God will bless you, as he promised you, and you shall lend to many nations, but you shall not borrow, and you shall rule over many nations, but they shall not rule over you.

These verses showed me that I needed to really look hard at my position on money and finances. It took reading Howard Dayton’s Free and Clear: God’s Roadmap to Debt-Free Living and all of Dave Ramsey’s books (yes all of them) before I really got intense about eradicating debt. Financial Peace really spoke to my relationship with Toni and how I could provide her a covering of protection (given to me by God) through eliminating debt and getting a strong emergency fund. Total Money Makeover gave me a simple enough plan to follow. I love Dave Ramsey’s books.

I read The Millionaire Next Door. It showed me how the truly wealthy don’t live anywhere near the way they can afford to live and that they are deliberately frugal. This frugality gives them security and the ability to do what they want when they want – a freedom a debtor can never have.

Honestly, the idea of getting to the point where money doesn’t matter is still a goal for us. God has put us on a path to financial freedom where we can abundantly bless the people and missions he sends to us. It is an awesome thing to be used by God in this way

Ladies, your husbands will probably not change overnight. Toni prayed and cajoled me for 14 years before I changed into someone who cares about debt.

What can you do to shorten your time in this process?

• Pray.

• Pray some more.

• Ask him to pray about it for you as the priest of your home.

• Pray again.

• Get copies of:

  • The Total Money Makeover: A Proven Plan for Financial Fitness

  • Free and Clear: God’s Roadmap to Debt-Free Living

  • Financial Peace Revisited

  • The Millionaire Next Door

• See if he’ll ask what you’re reading.

• Use that question as an opening to gently discuss the book and suggest he read it as well.

• Download the free Dave Ramsey Podcast on iTunes

• Listen to the Dave Ramsey Show on the radio.

• See if he’ll listen with you.

• Let these experts convince him that he needs to follow God’s holy word.

It changed my life when I started to apply the principles from these resources. It can change your husband’s as well.

Feel free to have your husband email me (af at armedforcesadvantage.com) if he’d like to begin a conversation about these things.

My wife is The Happy Housewife. It’s not because of me, our money, our kids, or anything of this earth. She’s happy because she tries to follow the Lord. You and your husband can experience the same joy God has given her in this area if you can both follow God’s word. Trust me, I know because I’ve been there. Better yet trust God because He has too.

The links above lead to Amazon.com. We checked the books out from the library rather than buying them - it’s more frugal.

For more Frugal Friday visit Biblical Womanhood.

Filed under: Frugal living, My life